A fresh start to a new outlook

First off, I want to say thank you to those who have commented on my posts, despite the age and length of my absence. Your kind words and thoughts have helped to snap me back into pieces of my old life that I want to continue with instead of weed out like I did with everything else.

I have been wanting to write on here again for some time- but, quite honestly, two kids (one of which is now only two months old), graduate school, and plain old house work have kept me busier than I like to be. Even now I should be working on my final that is due tonight, but everyone deserves a break!

The road of my life in the past year and a half of my absence has been full of turbulence, disappointment, and unprecedented joy. I will not sit here and recap it all, as that would take far more time than I can spare at this moment; but I would like to say after a year of neglecting my spirit and soul, I have finally started to find my peace again and have even started dreaming about deity once more. I am about to celebrate my one year anniversary with the man of my dreams, the one who I could not live without. I have a beautiful daughter who will be five next month and an amazing son who is now two months and two days old. He is a summer solstice baby. =)

I've learned more about myself than I thought possible, and I also learned more about others than I wanted to at times. But, the bottom line is, I'VE LEARNED.

I will be back on here again, now that I feel that I can. =) Again, thank you to those who have kept coming and reading. You are amazing. =)

Donn, Dreams, "the talk", and Tea Leaves

So, apparently I wasn't as back as I was hoping, as life is just now, FINALLY, settling back into a normal routine. Three days after Christmas, my mom, Jaelynn and I drove out to Seattle for a few days, which kicked off a series of events that I couldn't have even begun to fathom. We went out there to help a couple of my friends move, as well as take them all of Jae's old nursery stuff, as they are expecting their first child in April. Now, these friends of mine, I've known the husband since high school, and I've known them as a couple for four years now. Through our relationship, they were introduced to the "pagan" path, and have since began their own practice, working with Brigid and Odin, respectfully. On the drive out, I told my mother about their beliefs, so she wouldn't be shocked when we got there and we dealt with their altar. She took that information just fine, and we continued on our way. Our second night there, which was Thursday, December 29th, 2011 (as this date proves to be important later), she finally asked me WHY they had an altar. Well, we'll just say that that singular question sparked a whole lot of talking. Really she took it all very well. I avoided the word "witch", as she plainly admitted that she couldn't be believe witchcraft was "good". I did explain that magic isn't "evil" or "bad" but it's the intent of the person that makes it go one way or the other, as the energy itself is rather benign... Regardless, to avoid completely obliterating the progress being made, I didn't come out doing the 'I'm a Witch' dance. And, to her credit, the only time she got worried was when she asked if I still accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior and I told her no. We also had a very interesting talk about demi-gods, and she was rather... perplexed... when I claimed the Christ himself could be seen as a demi-god, as he has a divine father but a human mother... Anyway, no, I'm not opening that for debate, but it was something I threw out there for her to chew on anyway. =)

So, we came home on the 31st, and on the 1st I got a random text from my priestess and soul sister asking me who DAN (pronounced Dahn) was. we talked about it for awhile, coming to the conclusion that is was a deity, as I have no one in my life by that name. She explained that she had three dreams about me and this person and we both knew it was important. The dreams started the same night that I had the talk with my mom. Twilight Zone theme music time, right? Anyway, I prefer to keep those dreams private for the time being, but I will say that those dreams lead to me doing a very powerful meditation with Donn, the Irish god of the dead. In the time that I spent with him, I learned that because I have finally been able to free myself of restraints and be true to who I truly am, that I have become ready to begin a new journey that I was unable to take on until I had reached this point. I will be meditating with him on the dark moon for the next 3 moon cycles now, and I CAN'T WAIT!

Now, as to the tea leaves part of all the title... It's really just a little funny blurb from day, so here you go!

Until a few days ago, I had never heard of a fortune telling cup. When I heard of/saw a picture, I thought it would be totally cool to have one of those someday, for the shits and giggles if nothing else. Well, today I went to a flea market with my mom and dad and BEHOLD! I found one of those cups... It's called "The Cup of Destiny". It even came with a little book. SCORE.

Anyway... these are the special highlights of the past few weeks.. I hope you all are well!!

Many Blessings!

Holy Dreams Batman!

Ok, so many of you have likely seen my previous post on Dream Walking, and I have to say, since I wrote that post and started really working on my dreaming again, my dream time has been virtually over flowing! In the past week, I have been bombarded with many, MANY faces from my past (high school friends mostly) with varying themes and circumstances. Nothing that has struck me as weird or important, but it's like, in making this deeper connection with the unconscious, my mind is filtering through everything I've ever dreamed about and mushing it into something slightly different. I've been filing all these images and conversations away into on online "diary", so I can better keep track of any reoccurring themes, be it a face, a place, a conversation, or whatever. I've found that free online journals are absolutely amazing. Personally, I can type faster than I can write, so it's easiest for me to sit down, zip it all into a computer and call it good. HOWEVER, if I wake up in the middle of the night from a dream, I do have a journal and pen I keep on the head board that I can write key points in (in the dark of course... always fun to decipher later) so I have better recollection of it when I'm fully awake the next morning without waking my system completely up at some ungodly hour that I would rather be sleeping through. =)

Anywho... just thought I would put all this out there for you!

The Art of Dream Time

YES! I finally remembered one of the topics I've been wanting to write on... DREAM WALKING!

Dream walking is something that I've been working on (off and on) for the past couple of years. I had a great dream last week which triggered another onslaught of study and work, and so far, I seem to have made great progress. There are certain people that I have always been able to dream walk to... people that I have a really good connection with. There are others that are hit and miss, more often than not due to different sleeping times. =)

However, my dreams are not what I'm here to type on, but more of how those dreams are achieved. Without a doubt, sometimes it is totally random and unexpected, but other times it is a thought out plan, consciously made before heading to bed. I have found that one of the best methods for me starts with playing the dream in my head before I sleep. That is, the dream I want to take someone into. For instance, if I wanted to take my husband into a dream, before falling asleep I would create the entire dream. The location, the color of the sky, time of day, clothing, etc. would be know to me. From there, its a matter of meditating on that dream and letting my body drift into sleep while doing that. Once that happens, it's pretty much like the mind says "Ok, here we are! Let's go find Stephen and have some dreaming fun!". Granted, there are times when that doesn't always work, and also times were I won't remember the dream, but the recipient will (which is super annoying). Something that is also helpful is keeping a notebook and pen by the bed. I have discovered that I tend to wake up after dream walking, and if I don't write my dream down in the time, I will often loose some of the finer details and be left with hazy remnants when I wake up for the day later.

So what works for you? I'm a sucker for incense and some soft music. I even have play lists designed to cater to certain types of dreams. If I'm going into my "dream scape" (which is by a river a nearly lived on in high school) I will play music that reminds me of running water, so on and so forth. If you have never tried dream walking or seem to not be too good at it, I would highly recommend reading Psychic Dreamwalking: Explorations at the Edge of Self by Michelle Belanger. It is an excellent resource!

Well, speaking of dreams, it is time for me to go get ready for bed and see about making some new dreams!

For the sake of writting

So I was emailing with a friend today and had the realization that when I don't blog on a regular basis, my stress/level of distraction levels go up because of all the unnecessary clutter in my brain. Yup, I said it. BRAIN CLUTTER. Having come to this conclusion, I have decided to make a better effort to type everyday. Even it mean that I take a break from school (*gasp* I know, right). So, here I go!

I had the craziest dream back on Wednesday night, and the killer part is that I know its all true! I was leaving the building were we meet for circle, and, as usual, I was following behind everyone so I could lock up as we went. We had spent the lesson working on meditation and I was feeling GREAT! (Weird part is, that IS our lesson for this weekend... anyway...). We were all standing outside talking, and somehow we got onto the subject of flying. People were saying that flying was only possible in dreams or other realms and I remember looking at them and say no, the only this that keeps our feet planted on the ground is our own self doubt and inability to comprehend what we're capable of. So, to prove my point, I walked up to my car, climbed up to the hood, and just let go and jumped. There were some yells then a profound silence as I floated in the air, suspended by my own will and watched them collect themselves. I should point out that I didn't have "wings" but more of a opalescent shield around me. From there, I fell to my mom's house, and she didn't believe me when I told her why I didn't have the car with me, then I flew back home; that's the last thing I remember. For some reason (quite a few reasons actually) this dream was very profound to me. As it is, I rarely dream of flying, and the lesson was a strong one. We are our own worse enemy in life.
Just thought I'd share, as that dream has stuck with me all week.

Let's see.. what else...

Oh here's a fun one...
I have a girlfriend in Greece right now taking care of some military related stuff and we got to emailing back and forth the other day (I think it was yesterday morning), and she was telling me about this statue of Athena that she has acquired while on her trip. In return, I was telling her about some of my statuary (of Isis and Kuan Yin, respectively). She then asked me what statue I wanted from Greece, and she would send me one. Well, I had to stop and think about it for a bit because, while I know my Greek Mythology, I have never studied the path like I have others. So after a bit of reflection I decided on the Goddess Nyx. Now chances are that any book buff is going to jumped up and be like "Oh! She's from the House of Night Series!!" Yes, yes she is. However, while those being very good books (and with some amazing Wiccan/Pagan things in them that are accurate! Check it out here- Marked: A House of Night Novel) there is more to Nyx than what is seen in the book. As indicated by her name, she is the goddess of night, who was born of chaos, but is also the mother of light (among other things). The myth says the mother and daughter share a house together in the underworld while never seeing each other in it.
My thought behind that choice is easy. I have my goddess of light (Kuan Yin) and my goddess of balance (Isis), and it has actually been eating at me for a bit to find the prefect representation of the goddess of darkness. I could think of no better than Nyx (for me personally). My belief is that we all have a "dark" or "shadow" side that must be acknowledged, work with and through in order to start seeing our full potential in this life. My shadow side has been a battle at times, but I have finally gotten to the point that I can not only see it, but work with it when the time is right; so it is very important to me to have that representation.

Aside from the normal, I have taken up couponing. You know it. I've been impressed with how well it's gone (and how easily), so I'm excited to keep up with this! I actually can't wait to get my hands on the next Sunday Newspaper. =)

Well everyone, I do believe it's just about time to go brush and floss (because oral hygiene is VERY important), and head to bed! It's been nice to sit down and just write again. Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I loved putting it all out there! Many blessings to you!